How many Chinese people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Whats worse than a creep? ..... Paul sweeney!

You should get a new joke book............ because the newest edition has just be released

I'm shy. The last shitbender. How do you fit babies in that bowl? Get a blender.

roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

What did the worm say to the butterfly? Nothing, worms don't talk.

Knock knock.

Knock knock Whos there You spelt who's incorrectly You spelt whos incorrectly who ...................

Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

Knock Knock Who's there? 20 20 Who? 24

What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

A man is working at a bar. He feels a fly graze his left index finger, which has become a bit sweaty. The man rubs the finger for a moment, then continues to slice grapes for a customers synthetic japanese glue farm.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

a one fingered leper was sitting one day on the beach playing cards. When a stranger asked to play,hide and go seak. well the oner finger leper licked his invisible finger and said "which ways the winds blowing pete. .-poot-

What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete

Yo Momma is Like a Prostitute... ...I pay her for sexual intecourse

why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got run over

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know either, i'm just wondering why a chicken is trying to cross the road!

One day an irishman walked into a bar. he started to show off his accent when a nicely dressed lady said to him, "are you from ireland?". "AYE" said the irshman. " what part of ireland are you from?" drunk, the irishman replied "uh downtown" then the woman said, " did you come here alone?" then he replied"no i didn't come here a'lone.....DONKEY!!!"

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

Want to know how the dyslexic man with no left arm and no left leg? All left

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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