Who enjoys hearty wank sessions with friends and long walks on the beach? David Cameron.

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I went to a restaurant, but after I ate the food felt sick, then I remembered that I ordered penis with cum Popsicles so I knew it couldn't be the food

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How do you make an onion cry? Kill the chef.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

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Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

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How do you make lady gaga cry? Give her bad romance haven't you heard this joke before......DUMBASS

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dont be afraid of lard squeezing cause really its just me teasing

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What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

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Oh, go away

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A black man walks into a bar and orders a shot. He then precedes to drink it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, this is stupid, Violets are purple Violets are purple Oranges are orange Nothin' rhymes with orange wait.... DOORHINGE!!!!! -sincerely, That famous Orange on YouTube

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What do you call a child with a peg leg, and eye patch, and no hand? Names

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Yo mama so fat she at the rest of this joke.

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What's the difference between car keys and truck keys? Literally nothing.

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How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

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Well, its Eliza again, sorry to bother you Nero, I always thought you where good looking but I know that when it comes to you its not about the looks, you are far more than meets the eye. Neo-Nero was the guy we met at a certain meeting, the arrogant guy with the big forehead whose arms where shaking remember? I wont reveal more for his sake, he did not mean bad, he was just angry like the rest of us and felt responsible, again like many of us. So when can we meet you? I assume you wont be arriving soon, but Id really apreciate seeing you again, and considering neither I nor my parents (I asked them) have the money to come visit you, id appreciate a loan or something.

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do you know what was a good idea? not last night

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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I gotta friend named Michael Nugyen and he dishonored his family. Did I mention he was asian ( he live in tampa fl )

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his village has been ravaged by small pox.

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What's worse than failing a test Drowning

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What did Helen Keller say when she was hit by a bus? . : ; : . : . :

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Shelly tells Rob to go home... Thats what she said

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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