A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

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Roses are read violets are blue i ate a fetus now you die to

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What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Due to a lack of awareness of its surrounding, it died attempting to cross the road.

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Why did the black man get arrested? He sold cocaine.

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An English man, a German man and a Canadian man stood on the edge of a cliff. The English and German both jump off. What happens then? The Canadian says "they were serious?!" and runs away to fake his death and live the rest of his life as Frank Brown.

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Knock knock Who's there? The Land Lord The Land Lord who? I am here to evict you.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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theres no I in Intelligence a.w. j.p.

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What day comes after Friday? Saturday, and Sunday comes afterwards.

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Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

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Why did the little boy cry? He fell down the stairs

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whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

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Why did the boy ask his dad for a phone? Because he had his head stuck up a sheeps bum

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How do you make the general public confused? ...

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What do black people and asians have in common? arms

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What did the one Brick say to the other Brick? We have the same name.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm... What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being Gang-raped!

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He drowned.

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Your mothers so dumb that when she had to take a math test, she received a significantly lower grade than the rest of her classmates.

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You know what's funny? A well told joke

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You know what's gay? Grabbing another man's penis.

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Why didn't the kid eat lunch at school? He wasn't hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops