three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

What did the basketball player do before he scored a basket? Shot the basket ball

PS: Call me a monster, The Devil, a Psychopath, but know this... For those of you that decide to become my pray by not choosing the right side... ...I have far since surpassed any state of fear, of evil, of darkness that you can think off... What you call fear and suffer now, is but mere entertainment for me, and in not too long, you shall remember those deepest horrors which you carry, as the last pleasure you remembered. Moral: Stand by my side those of you which desire to become the children of darkness, and I shall show you pleasure and love, for those that reject pleasure and love, are, and shall moreso become those which we hunt for whichever deprived desire that lies in the soul, in the name of love and respect for their lack of desire for love of course, as no desire for love, is to embrace the eternal desire of fear, as your heavenly father used to say, "surrender to darkness and fear" It wont be a choice soon, its not as if you humans ever where in control of your fears and nightmares. Amen? That only means let it happen... I will make it so. SOLVE media: Down the rabbit hole, coincidence you say... If this world experiences "coincidences", IT IS BECAUSE I MAKE THEM HAPPEN ON PURPOSE.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because if he stayed on the farm, he would have been condemned to a miserable life, subjected to deplorable living conditions and an eventual pain-filled death by the hand of a cruel and heartless farmer. Crossing that road was his only chance of salvation.

Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

What's worse than getting sockson your birthday? Getting cancer on your birthday.

Homeless man....it's what's for dinner!

BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller

what porn does a nugget watch nugget porn.

How did the blind man end up in the hospital? He didnt see the bus coming.

what is green and has weels? grass i was kidding about the weels.

Women's rights

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

What is a black person's favorite color? There are many different colors and it would be unrealistic to believe that all the people of a single race would choose the same one as their favorite.

Your momma's so fat that she contracted type 2 diabetes and died at a young age because obesity is a huge problem in America.

Why did Teresa fall off the swing? She had no arms. Who is knocking at the door? Not Teresa.

Why was Helen Keller deaf, blind, and a woman? She was a bad driver.

What's black and white and red all over? The dead kitten on the road.

What do you call a woman between two houses? Her name.

Twinkle twinke little star How I wonder what you are? Star: (Noun) A fixed luminous point in the night sky that is a large, remote incandescent body like the sun.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

As we had been trying for some months now, I called my wife to ask her the result of her pregnancy test. A stranger answered and promptly told me she was killed in a car crash.

What is Hellen Keller's favorite TV show? She doesn't have one - She is blind and deaf.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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