A blonde just got a call from her boyfriend. He said i'll meet you at your house, so the blonde drove home, excited. Once the blonde got home her boyfriend was having sex with another girl. The blonde burst into tears and pulled out her gun then stuck it to her head. " No dont do it!" her boyfriend said!...... the blonde, not knowing what to do next said, " Shut up you cheater you're next!"

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Mom says my name I reply Coming.

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what do you call a black guy african american

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hers a joke... japanese people

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why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

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What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of tree? A Pool Table

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What do you call an blonde, brunette, and a redhead? There has yet to be a definition for a group of people categorized by hair color.

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What's black and white and enforces the rules at football games? A referee? Wow you're really smart.

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Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

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Beans, beans, are good for your heart the more you eat the less hungry you are.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Fine, ladies first.

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What's flaming and has wheels? A firepit. I lied about the wheels.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

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what would happen if every overweight person in america jumped at the same time? they would all get a little exercise.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are having a baby. Even Stevie Wonder saw that one coming.

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A circus clown climbs to the top of a five-storey ladder and dives into a foot-deep pool of water below. His neck is broken on impact. RIP Chuckles.

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Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

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Whats brown and sticky? Poop on a warm summers night.

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How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? One, its not a difficult task.

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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What's awesome that's awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Ketchup What else is awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Mustard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops