Why did the chicken cross the road? Some wild chickens have regular seasonal migration patterns that might require them to cross a road while traveling south. Wild chicken movements include those made in response to changes in food availability, habitat or weather.

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What did the psychopath say to the firefighter? Can you lend me a few bucks? My clothes are dirty and I need to go to the launromat.

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What do you get when you cross a leopard and Chuck Norris? I don't know. Probably something like a furry yellow Chuck Norris with black spots and sharp teeth.

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

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Two girls are backpacking in the Sierra Nevada. They walk 8 km from their base camp at a bearing of 42 degrees. After lunch, they document the wildlife they have seen because they are tracking the populations of species native to the area. Then they continue on their hike, but this time at a bearing of 127 degrees. After 5 km, they reach their destination for the day and set up a temporary camp.

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what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

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Like to tell patrick porcupine to stop gaming

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Why did Justin Bieber bieber his bieber? Because Bieber biebers his bieber when his bieber need a bieber bieber. BIEBER

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what do you do when mrs curaba gets heated through a fridge at her so she can cool down

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why did CJ cry?he just ate a pie full of meat from his favorite animal.Pig

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1 I've been diagnosed with-- 2 I don't give a f*ck, go die in a hole!

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How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

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Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

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What would you do when pigs fly? Pigs cannot fly, therefore this question is impractical.

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

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Your mama so fat That she suffers from heart disease

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

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Why did jim all I over? He dies

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Your mother has cupcakes, she offers you one, how many does she have left? The same amount she had before, you are full. Moral: Cupcakes.

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A bartender sees Jesus Christ, George Washington, and Adolf Hitler walk into his bar. The bartender is drunk.

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Moon: The sun shines bright like a virgin. He must be high..

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What's red, blue & green all over?

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops