Why did the little boy fall asleep? His parent pulled the plug.

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How do you stop a dog from barking? Cut it's head off

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What did one sausage say to the other? Nothing. Sausages don't talk...

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How do you torture Helen Keller? You put her on a table and slowly pull her limbs off

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Okay, but lets write a contract, if you regret your decision at anytime, you get it all back, minus what I have spent of course, both I and my wife have always wanted to live in a house by the sea, hopefully you nearby. You know, I have never been truly happy because I thought I could change this world, now I know that I tried and failed, maybe I can change myself instead, they say that true change comes from within.

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Invention I totally meant invention! XD, now okay, you can have the top comment, ill even read it because I like ya a lot.

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Q. What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A. An horse.

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A man is taking a shower in jail where he drops the soap. He proceeds to pick the soap up and cleans the rest of his body, puts his orange jumpsuit on and returns to his cell.

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad? A: Kill his family

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Roses are gay Violets are gayer when you hear girls moaning im the player

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Long joke Your such a downey

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knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

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whats wooden and hard a wooden floor

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Actual jokes are now obsolete.

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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what didn't Jon go to the movies? He tripped and broke his neck and cant look up

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Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

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What do you call a white guy with no friends? A white guy with no friends

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Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mother's funeral.

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Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

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An indian boy asked his Dad,'Why do we have such long names?' His father didn't reply, he died on the road home.

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People who are addicted to brake fluid just can't stop.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

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"knock knock?" ITS 2012 WE HAVE DOOR BELLS!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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