how do you get expelled? Rape a special ed kid.

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Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

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Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: He died on Christmas Day, before his parents could tell him they had maxed out their credit cards to take him to Disney World. His father has since relapsed into alcoholism. He knows his wife is cheating on him with another man, but understands that she needs comfort that he cannot give her.

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Why did the boy jump off a cliff Because he was gay and committed suicide

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What is the difference between a painting and Jesus? It only takes one nail to put up a painting

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What does it mean when your dog goes to the bathroom on your floor? He hasn't been very well potty trained By: robobob123

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Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

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Why was the black man lynched? Because he was found by angry racists in the 1930's.

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Why was the little girl not allowed to see the pirate movie? It was sold out.

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my mom just came up and saw me masturbateing

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Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

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Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

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America's Got Talent WIN! Britian's Got Talent WIN! Mexico's Got Talent WTF!

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Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

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what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

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What's the difference in a big brother and a wee brother? Ones big, ones small.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A tractor.

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what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

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roses are red violets are blue i'm allergic to pollen achoo

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What's black when its clean and white when its dirty? A black guy that rolls in flour.

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What did billy get after sex? Herpes

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what did pedobear say to the 60 year old man nothing he was too busy molesting the girl across the street

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her

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How do spell____? awk moment when u try asking someone how to spell something over text but they have no idea what ur saying

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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