Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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What do you call a man with a gun in his mouth? Keith.

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My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, Some don't.

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There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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all these jokes are horrible now

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There are no stupid Questions just stupid people

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What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

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Horse.

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What’s spotty, has three legs and is green all over? …well?

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

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Why did little polly fall off her her roof? Because she saw a ice-cream van

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting a handjob from Edward scissor hands

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Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

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What do you get when ned puts toast in the toaster? A fucking massive sperm whale.

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When is the only time you see a Mexican and Black person driving together ? When they feel like it .

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What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

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jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

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A guy watches TMJBtv on YouTube. He then shoots himself.

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Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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