So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

Why did the pirate get kicked out of the pirate movie? He killed 7 people while looking for treasure under the seats.

What's red and bad for your teeth A brick

What do you call a fish without an eye? Impaired of vision.

Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

Why did the duck turn black? an oil spill

Roses are red Violets are blue and oranges are orange nothing rhymes with orange

A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

What do you call a black man playing golf? A golfer.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Sorry wrong door.

Why did the jewish family move? Their house burnt down. They lost everything and was tragic

Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

Chris Brown can do no wrong. False he acquired several wrongs through his mistreatment of several women.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

Why are apples cheaper than lemons? Because you have to pay less money then lemons to buy them

I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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