Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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Wanna hear a joke? (Yeah, sure) So do I, got any?

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How come Helen Keller never played professional baseball? Because she was a woman

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"Hey! Did you get a haircut?" "No, I just started chemo..."

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Whats worse than a bee sting? -Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? -The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? -Three bee stings.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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How do you stop an African outlaw who uses child soldiers? Angelina Jolie

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a camel walks into a bar. it is kicked out because camels are not supposed to be in bars, there camels.

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Q-What's funnier than 24? A-Most black jokes

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At first I was at the party and I was like YOLO!! But then I got pregnant and was like yolo....

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what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its not for us to determine its motive, i'm sure it has its reasons

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BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

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Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

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Next season on teen moms, Justin Bieber tells her story.

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There are two kids playing basketball outside one kid shoots and makes it. The other youngster exclaims "nice shot!" because the other boy put the ball in the hoop from a very long distance.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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what did the turnip say to the plum? nothing, as most fruits and vegetables would've said

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I don't believe in giraffes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops