HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

How many mathematicians does it take to count?

A horse walks into a bar. Realizing the severity of the situation, the bartender heads toward the exit... stumbling over a chair.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

Knock knock! Who's there? Your mother. Oh, hi Mom! Come in!

What sound does a baby in a blender make? I don't know, I was too busy masturbating.

Knock knock. Who's there? Tim. Tim who? Tim Smith.

What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

the WNBA.

why did the teacher say that the student did well in class? because the student did well in class

whats black, white, and bloody all over? i don't know, but we should stop making jokes and help it already.

Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

A guy asks his girl friend to marry him and she says yes, so he buys her a new car - a Lamborghini Countach - she loves this car and she goes everywhere in it. One day, she picks up her kids from school. She's got a boy and a girl. As she's driving down the road, a car pulls up in front of her and they have a really nasty accident and she falls into a coma. When she wakes up from the coma there is a doctor next to her and she quickly asks doctor, "Where is my son? He was really good at football, he could have played for England and been better than Beckham." The doctor replies, "I'm so sorry, in the accident he lost his leg he won't be able to kick a football any more." The woman asks about her daughter. "Doctor, where is my daughter? She was really good at tennis and she could have been the best in the world and won at Wimbledon." The doctor says, "Sorry but in the accident she lost her arms and she won't be able to pick up a racket any more." She begins to cry. "Doctor," asks the woman, "how long have I been in this coma?" The doctor replies, "Six months." "So what's the date?" asks the woman. "April 1st," says the doctor. The woman begins to laugh "So you were joking then, were you?" Doctor: "YES... they had minor breaks and cuts but both have made full recoveries. I'll get them and your fiancé down here straight away." The woman is relieved and is discharged three days later to continue recuperating at home, while the doctor is sent to a tribunal for tricking her into believing her children had been maimed and eventually accepts early retirement with a generous severance package.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill all his friends and family.

A man tells the bartender," A bar walks into a man..." The bartender says," What the hell? I think you've had enough"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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