Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: the WNBA

Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

A black guy, Jewish guy, Chinese guy and a normal guy walk into a bar. They were all normal but the race of the last guy could not be easily determined.

chinga tue madre Ryan

What do you call a Koala bear that does not have a chin? A Koala bear.

Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

Why did Little Suzy get hit by a truck? Well the real question is, "Why was Little Suzy in the road," so why was she? Because she felt like it.

drew edminstin is a rat

ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

Q:What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A: A bike

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Whats worst than getting bombed by the russians? The holocaust!

A blonde heard that 90% of all crimes occur within a one-mile radius of the home, so she had a security alarm installed.

a duck walked up to a lemon aid stand and he said to the man running the stand... quack

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

A man walks into a bar. -Can I ask where am I? - he sais -Yes, you can. - sais the barman Awkward silence occurs. -Why aren't you asking? I said you can.

Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

What did the kid say when the doctor said he had cancer Oh No

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

A Serbian Film

Woman are equal and deserve respect just kidding they should suck my ****

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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