What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

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Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Ele PHa n T

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roses are red violets are blue i have dementia its not funny

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What did Superman get for Christmas. Nothing as he likes to stay detached from society.

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Okay, but lets write a contract, if you regret your decision at anytime, you get it all back, minus what I have spent of course, both I and my wife have always wanted to live in a house by the sea, hopefully you nearby. You know, I have never been truly happy because I thought I could change this world, now I know that I tried and failed, maybe I can change myself instead, they say that true change comes from within.

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What's funnier than 9/11? Nothing. 9/11 wasn't funny. It was a terrible tragedy, the most tragic in U.S. history. If you think that is funny you are a sick person. By: Logan in South Dakota

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What do a squirrel and a grape have in common? They are both purple except for the squirrel.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

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What did the contestant say to the game show host? If I don't win I will arrange to kill your family.

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What would you get when you cross a bear and a shark? a highly improbable situation because sharks and bears live completely different environments.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

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Why is Suzie at the bottom of the cliff? Because I pushed her. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

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A man with Azheim - Eh, I forgot what it was called.

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Do you know why I am excited? I don't know I'm asking you.

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Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

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How to stop a baby from crying? Hit it with a brick

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What do an eagle and a off-white light bulb have in common? Nothing.

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roses are red violets are blue daffodils are yellow pansies are pink

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Q: Who visits the dyslexic boy on christmas A: Satan

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A blonde, brunette, brown walk into a hair salon. They then proceed to each get they're own procedures done then leave not having any contact with each other.

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Say this to someone: On a scale from one to ten, what is your favorite color?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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