What happened when the chicken got to the other side of the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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What do you call a really old black person? Someone's grandfather

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Why was a mother crying at a hospital? Because a bird threw a stick at her five minutes ago.

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Your mom is so old, she was able to have children around the time you were born.

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Inspirational speaker: "You can judge a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him." Me: "Hitler loved dogs."

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Why did Johnny throw his money on the floor? Because he was giving it to charity

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what smells like red paint, but tastes blue? my heroine OD panflets

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"Do you have Prince Albert in a can?" "No." "Good. Tobacco causes cancer."

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A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

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if your having girl problems i feel bad for you son, i don't have any.

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What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the kid? Red because he got hit by the bus.

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A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

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Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

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when tempuratures get to high the elderly will start to DIE :( ;O

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

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Suzie has no arms. Knock Knock (whos there?) Not Suzie.

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Two muffins are in an oven. And by muffins I mean jews. They both die a horrible death.

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The girl was really drunk and passed out. She woke up the next day with a hangover.

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What do you call a black guy that steals a car? A father desperate to save his dying son who doesn't have a car to drive to a hospital

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there square amphibious wood gum flag homos CC

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25.

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for x-mas a bike

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops