Connor is homo

Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

Q. whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I dont jump on my trampoline with metal cleats.

If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

What do you call a blue horse with two legs and five eyes? A blue horse with two legs and five eyes.

Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

Why did the man visit 4chan? He heard about it from a coworker and was curious about what it was.

why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Why did Susie fall off the swings? Because she was hit by a truck.

What's worse than a teacher yelling at you? The holocaust

Thanks superman! Oh this is just what a regular Clark Kent would do... Uh... I mean... Dont worry Superman I know you arent Clark Kent, I just wonder why you work for him all day... Moral: What? What moral? What what?

why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

A Black man is running down the street with a T.V. He just bought it with the money he is getting from his recent promotion to partner at a local Law firm. He is running because he had to park far away and wanted to get out of the rain.

Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

My life is a dream in of itself.. inception???

Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can't fly, what choice did it have? All it wanted to do was to get to the other side. That chicken knew what it wanted to do in life. What do you want to do with your life? Be chicken smart. Cross the road.

Why Bono always walk barefoot ? Because he's an asshole.

What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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