What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names

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Wanna know my life in a nutshell? Well you can't. Life is an inanimate object an will therefore not fit inside anything, let alone a nutshell.

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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A duck walks into a bar. Then he walks out.

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I worship you Nero, and I wont even begin to explain myself why.

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why weren't all the jews wiped out in WW2 the gas bill was too expensive

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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Hail Hitler

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whats the difference between a ladybug and a jew? there is none

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Cover me, im going in.

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Why did the boy eat the chips? Because he was hungry

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Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

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I thought it was the WHITE house. C'mon Obama. C'mon

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a penis? I don't have a stash of ferraris in my garage.

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why did the the frog cross the road? because he was on the chickens back

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The man and the women were doing something. What are you looking? They just talked

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Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

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Q: Whats the difference between nude pics and your mom? A: I can wackk off to nude pics

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why did hellen kellers dog run away? because if your name was awughunguh you'd run too.

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Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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A man was walking home when a little boy ran up to him. He said "hey mister, how do you sleep apples?" Then the man wasn't sure why he asked him so he spelled it out for him "that's easy my boy, A-P-P-L-E" the little boy said "you said pee pee!" Then he laughed and ran off

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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Are you thinking Arby's? No. My grandmother died of tuberculosis and it's troubling me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops