My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

If youre African, why are you white?

The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

What do you put your key on? A key chain.

A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

Q:Why are all of the vampires extinct? A:AIDS is a serious disease. You shouldn't joke about it.

The air is green The grass is blue I'm bot stoned.. I'm just high

What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay the manufacturers suggested retail price.

Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

The power of Mindfuck: What if you can only walk left when you are right? And if you can walk right when you are the only one left? What is left when everything is right? Moral: Create a right world by taking the left road? YOU PIECE OF FILTH!

There was a Indain and cowboy hunting together. the Indian put his ear down to the gound and said "buffulo come". The cowboy said he didnt see anything when the Indian said, "its Sticky!!!

A white man went to the basketball court to play basketball and was confronted by a group of black men. They kindly invited the white man to play basketball with them and they had a nice day

24

i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red OMFG MY LAWN IS ON FIRE !!!?

Knock knock Who's there? Fuk Fuk who?

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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