Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

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Whats the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have a Bar Mitzvah in Holocaust Germany.

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What's racecar spelled backwards? Jesus.

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Why did the boy fall of his BMX? Because someone threw a dish-washer at him.

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There was an elephant , a bird, a man, a tree, a cat, a dog, a lion, a horse, a cow, a pig, a duck, a lemon, a turnip, an apple, a rabbit, a slice of pizza and a spoon. I just wasted around 8 seconds of your life

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Q: So I don't get it. Do women actually like not having penises and testicles? Do they genuinely enjoy it? A: Silly boy. Women ADORE not having penises and testicles. You just can't get your mind around someone having different preferences in anatomy than you.

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So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

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What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the elephant.

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Why did the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field

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Why did sally fall off the swings? She didn't have any arms. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally, she doesn't have any arms.

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what's the difference between you and a yack one is a spitting idiot and the other one is a camel

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Why does a new mother have big jugs? Her baby died of Sudden infant death syndrome.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i get tired of this shit let's have some grey goose

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Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if it weren't for the women our peckers would rust. By:Jhonny Thomas Spikes & Trenton Thomas Prather

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A man quites his job to open a coffee shop which has been a dream of his for years, The shop does well with a healthy supply of customers and a steady income,The man is now financially stable.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

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What's the different between a blond and a brunette? Blondes taste better when cut into small pieces and fried in a skillet.

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Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

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How did the Jew survive the Holocaust? Trick question he didn't

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There were two men 1 says "hey stupid" and the other man says "Yeah"

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why did the drug dealer die... because he got terminal cancer and died during the first 3 weeks

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should i know, i do not speak chicken.

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Why did it rain happiness? The people who wrote the jokes above and below this one exploded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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