What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

What smells like pizza and likes to roll? Pizza rolls.

drew edminstin is a rat

What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

A black guy, Jewish guy, Chinese guy and a normal guy walk into a bar. They were all normal but the race of the last guy could not be easily determined.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

chinga tue madre Ryan

i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

If you're happy and you know it get a life

ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

Q:What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A: A bike

Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: the WNBA

What do you call a Mexican with a rubber toe? Rober-to. What do you call a black guy with a big toe? Tobe Bryant

Why did Little Suzy get hit by a truck? Well the real question is, "Why was Little Suzy in the road," so why was she? Because she felt like it.

A blonde heard that 90% of all crimes occur within a one-mile radius of the home, so she had a security alarm installed.

a duck walked up to a lemon aid stand and he said to the man running the stand... quack

What do you call a Koala bear that does not have a chin? A Koala bear.

Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

Whats worst than getting bombed by the russians? The holocaust!

Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a kangaroo? An irrelevant punchline.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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