Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

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What is black and white and red all over? A road killed zebra.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why didn't Clemson accept John Burns' college application? Because John Burns was wanted for five counts of first degree murder.

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why did the white man walk into the bar? He was thirsty

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A hindu and a muslim walk into a bar. They start arguing over their different fundamental religious beliefs and then considering it is an american bar, an american christian extremist quickly shoots them both for being " from that part of the world"

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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What is black and white and red all over? Black people in a blender. I lied about the white

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What did the bacon say to Sam's eggs? Why are you green?

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Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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Q:Why did the Mexican cross the border? A:To come to America to provide for his starving family.

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what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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Once ther was a happy little boy and he was just playing with his dinosaur when he was hit by the school bus that was supposed to take him to school. The End

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Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

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why cant fat people walk because they are fat

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he needed to go to work to help pay for his dying daughter's cancer treatment

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

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what do u call a joke with no punchline? A non-harmful joke

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What's the simularity between a eagle and a rock? They both fly, exept for the rock.

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Whats funnier than a black guy dieing? Everything thats not funny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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