A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen and warns him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and otherwise damaging consequences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

Q: Why did the wihte man buy a burger? A: cuz he was hungry

What do you call two black men walking down a stairwell? Their names.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

Robert Mugabe.

Did you hear the one about Steven Hawking into a bar? I havn't either, but its probably a hoot.

Let's get some comments on this one! Everyone add a comment with a quote from a movie! I'll thumbs-up the best comments!

Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

what do u call a joke with no punchline? A non-harmful joke

YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

why cant fat people walk because they are fat

what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he needed to go to work to help pay for his dying daughter's cancer treatment

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

Q:Why did the Mexican cross the border? A:To come to America to provide for his starving family.

Once ther was a happy little boy and he was just playing with his dinosaur when he was hit by the school bus that was supposed to take him to school. The End

What's the simularity between a eagle and a rock? They both fly, exept for the rock.

why was six afraid of seven It wasnt. numbers are not sentient or tangible and thus are incapable of feeling fear

Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if he tore his ACL last week trying out for wood chucking nationals? A: Woodchucks don't possess the ability to chuck wood, nor do they have ACLs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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