What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

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Q: What goes up but doesn't come down? A: Columbia

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6 in every 9 people find a dirty reference in every joke. This statistic is in fact false, as 5 in 9 people actually find a dirty reference.

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What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

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Face...tastes like chicken!

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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( . Y . )

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Why did Ant Man die? He was shot by a gangster, duh.

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Jake: Where's Waldo Me: Where? Jake: I don't know

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

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What's the difference between a melon? One of its halves are both the same.

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a man walks into a desert Obama is there to greet him and they have a nice chicken dinner

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an atheist and a christian meet in a bar they chat about football, order some pints, and have a really good night.

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Why was the kid crying Cuz there was a frog stapled to his head

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Whats brown and rhyme's with "Snoop?" Dr. Dre

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Why did the Nun refude to say Thank You Father? Because she was raped by her father as a child.

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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Two black guys are in a car. Who is driving? One of the black guys.

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A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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