A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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14 people jump in a hole about 25 ft deep. they can't climb out because it is a straight vertical drop.

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What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

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What did the boy eat for breakfast? Food

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Why did the girl fall off the stage? Someone shot her.

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What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

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What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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An asian and a black guy walked into a bar. An ambulance rushed to their aid as they were in great pain and had a slight chance of becoming paraplegic.

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Q: How many Jews are there in Germany? A: None, they all died in the holocaust

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

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What do you call a dead black man? A corpse.

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If you were a pie I'd eat you

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a farmer asked me "were is my pig?" and I said ' I got hungry" :()

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

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A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

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Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? they can SHOOT, STEAL and RUN.

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What is the difference between an apple and an apple? One has a brown spot.

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What do communists and strawberries have in common? You can eat them.

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What does a tomato and a human have in common? They both spray red liquid when stabbed repeatedly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops