What did the gym coach tell his student? Come on! You can do it! Push harder!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

What do you call someone that has befriended a fisherman? Fishermans friend Moral: Strongest there is.

Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

Roses are red, VIolets are blue, Tulips are white, Sunflowers are yellow

At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

What's worse than a burglar breaking into your house in the middle of the night? A rapist breaking into your house in the middle of the night.

wanna know the biggest joke on antijoke.com? People's spelling.

Why did they use the phone as a football? Because it was a phone-ball.

Knock knock Who's there Done Done who? Done with waiting out here, let me in you dick!

Jokes=Funny Anti=Opposite Anti+Joke=Anti Joke Anti Joke= Anti Humour Anti Humour + People= Offensive Jokes Offensive Jokes= Often jokes about women Offensive Jokes=Problems Women=Problems

Knock knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your stupid.

What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

What do you get when you cross a black man and a Mexican man? I don't know.

Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage?

knock knock who's there? I'm here.

Ok everyone, you know that kid that after his joke he'll put louis on the bottom because that's his name? He sucks at joke telling and if you see any of his jokes, DISLIKE THEM!

Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Your momma has such a bad pancreas that it releases insulin into her bloodstream all the time. NOT just in response to glucose.

Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

A man walks into a bar... "OUCH", he says for no apparent reason. He then buys a beer.

hi dave

what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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