Who is a pussy? Jeff Misner

What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

What do you call a black man eating a chair. I don't know and this is highly unlikely because chairs are inedible therefore this circumstance is impossible.

Who's the fastest kid in AA

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

Yo momma's so poor, she needs to work 2 jobs to support her family.

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, none of them did.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

Yes or No? You're wrong because it was both.

haha your power hose was robbed and the shitty bike

Tic tac toe Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

What's green and invisible? Nothing; green and all other colours of the rainbow have wavelengths that occur specifically in the visible range of the electromagnetic spectrum. Therefore any invisible object cannot be green.

What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

knoc knock! who's there? poo on! poo on who? you!

Why did the man cross the street? Because he had to go work.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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