What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

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What do baseball and The Holocaust have in common? They're both sports, except for the The Holocaust.

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

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Why scooby-doo likes cookies? Because he's chub!

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What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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how doyou wake up lady gaga youu poke er face

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An Irishman walked into a pub.... He never left.

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What did nearly headless nick say when he became headless nick. Nothing because he doesnt have a head

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What is black and white and red all over? Black people in a blender. I lied about the white

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Yo mama so old, she might die soon

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what did the man do when he was at the end of his rope? he bought more rope.

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This made my day: The Japanese verb "to drink" is "nomimasu". [L]

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

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Why is NO ONE on Facebook when I AM?! Because you have no friends... on Facebook... ... Wow.

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So an alien walks into a bar......... and everyone runs away secreaming because theres an alien in the bar.

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What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

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How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

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There is a famous joke, "What's black and white and re(a)d all over? A newspaper!" However, this is not featured on this website. Why? Because this is anti-joke.com, not joke.com - you moron

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Why was the man so fat? Because he is in a wheel chair and can't exercise.

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a man and his son pull up out side b&q and the man says to his son run in there and get me a black n decker and the boy goes in and is standing in the power tools isle and he looks round and there is a lady standing next to him so he hit her, the woman happened to be black and 2 minutes later a security guard rushes round and says son what did u do that for and the son said my dad told me to come in and get a black n decker!

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Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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