Knock Knock! Who's there? The mailman! The mailman who? *opens door* Just kidding, I'm actually an axe-murderer!

I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face" The horse responds "My daughter has cancer"

What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

what happened to the man who fell off the boat? He died!

Man 1: Did you hear that one about that girl who killed herself? Man 2: No Man 3: Yeah, neither did I

Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken? That one! Grandma, that's a hobo. Put your glasses on.

A small black boy was walking down the street. He ran into a police officer and the police officer shot him, why? A: Because the officer was racist.

So I was walking along the beach one day and I see this whale. Then this dolphin named Lennie came up and was like, "Hey whale, how've you been? I haven't seen you in a while." And the whale was like, "Sorry, but I can't talk to you." And Lennie was like, "Whyever not?" And the whale said, "Because I'm not a starfish!"

Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

Did u think that last joke was funny? Well this one isnt

Whats the difference between a falcon and a deer? both live in water, except for the falcon... oh, and the deer.

what did the n i g g e r with alzheimers say to the c h i n k? 9/11 was the funniest fake joke since the holocaust and 9/11 and the holocaust and 9/11... and... what?

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

What's long and sexy? The Eiffel Tower

What's the difference between a black man and a bench. The bucket.

What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

What do Muslims have for breakfast? Corn Flakes.

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

What's the difference between 2 pieces of meat? Nothing

Velcro. What a rip off.

A redhead walks into a bar and goes to the restroom. She needed to pee.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Dave. Dave, who? Dave, your neighbor, I ran out of eggs making a quiche, could I borrow a few?

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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