- Anti Joke

What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

Yo mama so fat, when the waiter handed her the menu, she said "yes"

Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone? Because she had no arms. Knock, Knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

knock knock Person A: who's there Person A: oh shit that was me

What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend? I have AIDS.

Doctor, everybody despises me. That cant be totally true you despicable piece of shite!

Why couldn't the child go to the park? He was a registered sex offender.

What's white, wet, and salty? Salt that has come in contact with a liquid in the recent past, seeing as the liquid has not evaporated completely from the combination of sodium and chloride yet.

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHH!

Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

Ya Mums so fat when she stood on the scales it came up with my phone number

Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

Q: What did the pony say when it had a sore throat? A: "I have throat cancer and only have six weeks to live."

SBB

Why did the man cross the road? To get to the homeless shelter.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

DON"T READ THIS!

When does a cat not land on its feet? When it has paws.

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

Why was the baby flying? Because it's face was stapled to the propeller of a helicopter.

what do women and men have in common? nothing, women are inferior

whats not funny and has access to a computer and reasonable internet? Me

What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.