There is a bus full of puppies and babies with a plane flying above it carrying 2 tons of explosives. The Bus arrives safely at its destination.

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What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets Wet.

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What do you call a group with one Jew and three Germans? Friends

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Q: Why could John say goodbye to his girlfriend ? A: He didnt have one

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

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What do you do when you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath? Laugh at him

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A bike.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Rape

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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"Roll back into the kitchen and imagine me a sandwich!" yelled the abusive husband to his paraplegic wife.

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A fish swims up your penis...

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why did the man paint his house? cause he never wanted to mow the lawn

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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What do you call a full refrigerator? A freezer

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What do you get when someone tells you an anti joke? An anti joke.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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What doesn't kill you and doesn't make you stronger? Aids

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Why was Timmy so unpopular at school? Because he caught aids of his pet rock

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A girl and her family were walking by a cliff. Suddenly - due to a a part of the cliff falling away - her family fell over the edge and died. The girl ran to the bottom of the cliff and saw her family's body's strewn across the rocks, blood everywhere. She didn't have a phone on her and so could not call the police. She called over a man she saw in the distance. He asked "What's happened?". Just managing to stammer the words through her tears she said "My entire family fell off a cliff and died". The man unzipped his trousers and said "This really isn't your day is it love?"

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How many lesbians did Tiger Woods bang? None, his standards are much higher than that

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nicky finds it really hard to get it up.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon, and Michael Jackson is dead....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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