a horse walks into a bar, hours later it walks out on two legs and the man who saw it all happen couldn't believe his eyes. The man then turns to the bartender and says, "I theenk eye've had enuf, Cut me hoff!"

What's Arabs' cutlery? Bread

What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both can fly except for the mole

wenis

There are two types of people in this world, those that can extrapolate from incomplete data

Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: toothpaste

Two guys walk into a bar, have a good time, and exit the bar, relatively sober. They are driven home by a friend who agreed to be the designated drive for safety purposes and enjoy the rest of the evening with their wives, to whom they are happily married. Then the joke ends abruptly.

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

What is black and white and red all over? Black people in a blender. I lied about the white

What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

There are two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other "dang, it's really hot in here." Realizing that muffins can not talk the other muffin wakes up to a very hungry man biting his face.

what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because its rayseans favorite number

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

You know what's wrong with Oprah? Generally nothing. She's a well-respected African American woman who happens to be quite wealthy and likes to share her wealth with other people.

Q: Why was the man eating his foot? A: Because he was a part of the circus.

How Do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door take the elephant out put the giraffe in and close the door. The lion king has a meeting with all the animals but one doesn't turn up, which one is it? The giraffe because it's still in the fridge.

A Man Gets Cancer He eventually Loses all his hair and drops dead

What do you call a man running around town with no clothes on? Naked.

When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? there are more birds on that side

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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