Q: What did the angry German man say to the Ameican? A: I dont know, I can't speak German!

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Once upon a time, there was a ghost. The ghost was sneaking up on a little girl when she turned around and asked the ghost "Are you a stalker or something?" The ghost, unable to reply (being a ghost) was then kicked in the shins. The End!

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so a piece of grass is walking down the street..... wait a minute thats not right.

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Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

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An old man walks into a bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

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The kid next door was running around shouting spells and carrying a wand. ''I bet you'd love to be like Harry Potter!'' I told him. ''Yes!'' he exclaimed. So I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

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hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

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How did little Jimmy survive the 5 story fall? He didn't

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try this on someone: Knock Knock Who's there? Knock Knock Who's There? Knock Knock They will keep asking who's there while you laugh

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Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in a zoo don't be mad I'll be there too not in a cage but laughing at you

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So a guy with no legs and no arms is on his death bed. He asks to sky dive one time before he dies.

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Why was Samuel L. Jackson so tired of those motherf***ing snakes on that motherf***ing plane? Because if snakes are loose on a plane, they might bite you.

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Three men walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

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Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

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A fat African a rich mexican and a gay guy jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? The gay guy because fat Africans and rich Mexicans don't exist

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

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How do you make a clown sad? You kill his family.

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A sheep croses the road It gets hit by a car.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Why did god make asians? I dont know. Yah, me niether

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whats the diffrences between black people and a tire nothin

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What is worse than getting hit by a car? Getting hit by a truck

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Roses are bitches Violets are two, your mother is a bigger bitch then both

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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