Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

No!

What's black and is hanging from a tree in my backyard? Avocados.

a guy fell off a roof of a mansion he died his family cried F.Y.I i have Alzheimers toilet monster

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

What do u call a man who is smart. A lawyer/ genius/ smart man

A man walked into a bar and a knife seventeen times.

wats green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree, it would kill u? a pool table

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

A man walks into a bar. Sup.

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

Why was the women not in the kitchen? Because she was probably doing something else

What did the customer say to the waitier? "I think I'll have the special."

What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

Whats bigger than a toaster and smaller than an oven? ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .... .... . ... . . . ..... ...... ..... a microwave . ..... . ... ...

What color was the black guy's skin? Brown

ew. I wouldn't sleep with you if you were the last man on earth! ...that's what she said!

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? If i knew, I'd tell you.

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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