Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

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Yo mama so stupid, she signed an apointment with Dr. Pepper

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Knock Knock Who's There? Steve Steve who? Your friend Steve, you called and told me to come over. Oh, come in.

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why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

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what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

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Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? having a worm sized penis.

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Roses are red Grass is green Get in the van If you know what I mean

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Why does Tim Tebow kneel and pray after there's a positive outcome of the previous play? No, seriously, why does he do that?

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caoimhin you satan of CHRIST IM A DICIPLE OF CHRIST UNLIKE YOU

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What's worse than walking into a door by accident? Finding out that your mother molestors children.

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what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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Why did the white girl lose the race? The girl that she was beating was black and her boy shot her. Therefore the black girl won.

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Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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what is big and white? Your Mom

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What did the librarian say to the three black men in the library? Nothing. Those three men were Harvard graduates and were very respective of libraries, and thier policies.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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How do you get out of editable poly? You don't.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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knock knock who's there? Jehovah's witness GOOD BYE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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