Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

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What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

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Why couldn't Billy write his own name... ...because he was wearing purple lemonade???

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what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

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XD Thats what I was expecting from you, you do not go down without a bit of struggle and a tussle huh?

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Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

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Why did the blonde girl lie? Because she's a liar.

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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ask me what my temperpedic bed is like. ''whats it like?'' i dont know ive never had one actully.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

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Did you hear that the actress, Reese what's-her-name, got stabbed to death? Witherspoon? No, with a knife.

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Hitler, Mussilini, And Hideki Tojo Walk In To A Bar Mitzvah, Everyone Was Brutally Murdered & No One Survived.

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Your name is Fired, your Boss comes up to you and says "Your Fired" You say "I know my name." Your boss gets mad and throws you in a chimney

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why did the guy round second base? to get to 3rd

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roses are red, violets are red, ive been shot in the eye with a pelet gun, please ,please help

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What"s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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People thought hitler said "I want to burn the jews" he really said "I want a glass of juice".

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Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He didn't believe in santa.

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How do you find a true idiot jump in the road when the light is green.

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What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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A man walks into a bar . . . he is tired and thirsty after a long day at work.

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Q:How many pancakes can you fit on top of as doghouse? A:Purple. Because ice cream has no bones.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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