Whats the leading cause of death Life.

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How do you get an elephant in the fridge in three moves open the door, put it in, close the door How do you put an giraffe in the fridge in four moves open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, and close the door

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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why was the black kid so good at basketball because he practiced a lot

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What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

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Do you know why I am excited? I don't know I'm asking you.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo Boo who? I don't have a last name, it's just Boo

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What do you do if a bird shuts on your windscreen? A:never take her out again.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was mentally retarded and didnt know any better.

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Did you just fall from heaven? If not I'm gonna beat the shit out of you

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A man walks into the bar and ask the bartender for a shot of vodka. He drinks the vodka.

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What's sad about black people that drink grape soda and eat fried chicken? The stereotypes are true.

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What do you call a black woman in a pool? Drowning.

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A: Why is that boy on the ground? B: He fell. A: Why did he fall? B: He tripped. A: Why did he trip? B: I tripped him. A: Why did you... B: BECAUSE I WANTED TO!

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Want to burn 3000 calories in under 5 MINUTES? Take a store bought pizza and put it in the over for as long as you want. Just watch the calories burn away in a puff of smoke!

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What starts with S and end in H-I-T? shit.

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What did the woman say when the man got her flowers? "Why thank you."

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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I remember the last words my Grandfather said before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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How do you confuse a blonde? Inform her that she is an illegitimate child resulting from a vicious, torturous rape and that her mother will never truly love her.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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jordan godfrey is good looking lolololol

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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