here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

thumb_up thumb_down +100

knock knock who's there? no one... your lonely so you hear things

thumb_up thumb_down +86

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

thumb_up thumb_down +80

Roses are red, violets are blue. Except, technically, violets are violet.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

Why was the mother crying Her son was killed by a meteor

thumb_up thumb_down +74

What's green and goes "Kablowie!"? Probably nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

Why couldn't johnny go home? Someone commited arsen and burned it down.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Four guys walk into a bar. They buy their drinks and stay for a couple of hours. After they are done they get a cab ride home. It was a lovely night.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What happened when the tree fell It killed someone

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Three nuns were talking in the church. The first nun said, "I was looking in the Priest's desk and found a condom." The second nun said, "I saw also saw that condom, except I poked holes in it." The third nun promptly reported them to the Priest causing the first two nuns to lose thier jobs.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A blonde, a brunette, and a ginger all die in a car accident. Their souls all go to heaven. Nevermind, only the blonde, and brunette's souls went to heaven, since everybody knows, gingers don't have souls.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why was the Librarian mad at the laughing kids?? they were laughing cause someone shot her.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Two peanuts are walking down a dark alley. One was a honey roasted.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was wearing a shirt depicting a skull, something six had an irrational phobia of.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because not only was she deaf and dumb, but she was also blind and it's not possible to drive if you are blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a black man without a job? A man disenfranchised by the failing American economy.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's worse than being mugged? Being raped by bulbasaur.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops