Why did the chicken cross the road? Why are you worrying about the chicken? You just got shot.

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What did the blind man say when you asked hi his favorite color? Nothing he is death too

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Knock, knock. Whose there? Me. Leave.

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Q: Why don't chicken breasts have nipples? A: because if you freeze them, they will pop the package.

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What did the basketball player do before he scored a basket? Shot the basket ball

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in an open hole Poor body disposal practice

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care what a chicken thinks?

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What did the group of black men do to the old white woman? Gave her back the purse she dropped.

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A man walks into a bar with his dog. He orders 14 shots and proceeds to drink. For each shot he takes, he feeds one to his dog, who accepts it willingly. The bartender says "Well I've never seen anything stranger. Why did you order 14 shots, and why are you giving half to your dog." "Well," says the man, "my 14 year old dog was diagnosed with a fatal heart condition. I cannot afford to put him down, so the shots should kill him." The dog then dies.

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Getting all F's on your report card isnt that bad.... I mean you could go home to find your whole family murdered and your Girlfriend hanging from a noose.

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almost as accidental as your spelling im afraid

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Why did the blonde turn red Because some one lit her on fire

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what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

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Why does Billy hate waiting in line? Because he's impatient.

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Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

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Why did the old man cry? Because he had just witnessed his wife die.

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How can you tell if someones gay? You ask them.

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There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

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A lady with alzheimers walks up to her friend and says" my nefew died today" and her friend replied.. " no he died three years ago."

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How do you confuse a bus driver? Go invisible and throw bananas at him

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How old is victor? Half past dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops