What do you call a black guy that steals a car? A father desperate to save his dying son who doesn't have a car to drive to a hospital

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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when tempuratures get to high the elderly will start to DIE :( ;O

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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Yo mama is so fat she needs to wear extra large.

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How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

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you know what? CHICKEN BUTT. butt of chicken ahahahaa

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

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there square amphibious wood gum flag homos CC

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why the chicken cross the road? because he just committed 3rd degree murder and was try'in to commit suicide

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Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

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The girl was really drunk and passed out. She woke up the next day with a hangover.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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How do you make a blonde woman act in a porno? You get her consent and pay her money.

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Two muffins are in an oven. And by muffins I mean jews. They both die a horrible death.

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In the time it has taken you to read this, a small African child has died.

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Perverted man: Nice bum where u from Hot ladie with the nice bum: Boston Mass so kiss my ASS

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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did you hear about the dyslexic, overweight, wheelchair bound blind guy? No? Niether did I, I'm deaf so don't hear about anything.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven beat and raped Six when he was child multiple times, and Seven threatened to kill Six if he told anyone.

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What do you call a person with an axe stuck to his head? What's your name?

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What's clear and looks like water? Water.

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Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

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What would Bruno Mars do if he was on the moon? Gasp and grab his throat in an attempt to get oxygen flowing into his lungs with no avail.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops