Did you know that Hellen Keller had a roller coaster in her backyard? Neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why did the chicken cross the road? the sudden lack of sidewalk dictated as such.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why did the koala fall out of the tree? it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Two cannibals are eating a clown one turns to the other and asks "does this taste funny to you?" The other cannibal says " yeah because the clown has been dead for weeks."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: Holy do you get a nun pregnant? A: You have sexual intercourse with her, and have an orgasm inside her body. Also, in vitro fertilization is a viable, albeit expensive, alternative for couples who have difficulty conceiving by standard intercourse.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

whats worse than finding a holocaust in you apple...........

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do Elephants never forget? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -23

I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

a chinese man pays the full price

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? Depends on how big the lightbulb is

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Wanna here a joke? Dylan Shipleys penis!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A religion is like a penis. They are both nouns.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only anal because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A cow went into a meadow and ate some grass. Some time later he wandered off.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

If your falling up a ladder and your canoe runs out of gas, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog houes? A. George Washington B. India C. Blue Answer: False

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Hi, this is Luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

The teachers cat is a fat cat and his name is ... why do even whant to know you stalker

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's that Lassie? Timmy fell in the well again? And you couldn't care less because the stupid kid never looks where he's going?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did a 36 year old Asian man stop in the middle of raping someone A: He realized that what he was doing was immoral and that it could scar someone for the rest of there lives and that he could serve a sentence of up to 35 years which would mean he would miss out on the special offers that QVC has to offer during this time

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What has feet, but no legs? An alien.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did Johnny disappear? He was sucked into a vacuum toilet on an air jet.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops