Why did the boy spill his lemonade? He was attacked by ravage dogs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. 97

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Ruff, hi, ruff ruff, we are both dogs ruff ruff, ruff ruff, ruff!!

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whats worse than a worm in your apple..? getting shot..

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Two cannibals are eating a clown one turns to the other and asks "does this taste funny to you?" The other cannibal says " yeah because the clown has been dead for weeks."

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I man sees a shooting star and makes a wish. Nothing happens as shooting stars are incapable of granting wishes.

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What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

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Oh, go away

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Why didn't john go to school? He has terminal cancer and he must stay at hospital

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How do you make an onion cry? Kill the chef.

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Why did the vagina smell so bad? Because it had yeast infection.

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why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

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So a guy walks in to a bar.... and orders a beer.

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What's worse then 10 babies nailed to 10 trees? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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how many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

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Q: Why is little Timmy living without his parents? A: He is ninety seven years old!

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How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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Did you hear the joke about the pencil? Nevermind it was pointless.

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What has feet, but no legs? An alien.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought is was yours.

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Q: Whats the deifference between me and you A: The fact that im the beautiful one -RDV

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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