Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Q: Wgat do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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Irish sobriety

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swingset? Neither did she.

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Why did the chicken cross the road the chicken is blind and deaf and happened to wander into the street and got hit by a car and was instantly killed

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

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poop.

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Ouch, a papercut .. what could be worse? A hatchet cut.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? because she had no arms. --- Knock, Knock Whos there? Not Sally.

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A man walks into a bar. Another man becomes the Limbo State Champion.

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How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

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Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Therefore, I am a potato.

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What is funny to watch but stinks of shit. Jews oh and SBB they both stink and are funny to watch.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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A black guy NOT arrested for being black.

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Why did the boy get teased? Because his name was spelt wrong (k)urtis

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-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

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how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

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what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

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What Happens when you kill a dragon? Nothing, there not real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops