Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

What's the worlds most popular burger? The Krabby Patty

what did the dog say to the cat? bark what did the cat say to the dog? nothing it ran away

Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

Two black men walk past a white man who recently hung himself from a tree. Oh the racist irony.

Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

Caramel Boing.

Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

Why did the Mexican cross the border? He wanted to live a better life in pursuit of freedom and a better job.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Jimmy is taking a walk to Dairy Queen he walks into an allyway where he is shot with a 44 magnum and later dies in hospital his family morns

What do you call a cow that's not cooked? A cow

How did Pablo get into America from Mexico? He drove here!

Why did the hobo break both of his arms? He didn't like them.

What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

Knock Knock. Who's there? You Know. You Know who?.......GOODBYE!

How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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