Knock Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah's witness.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? answer: Where's my tractor?

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whats got two legs and cant walk a paraplegic

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what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

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Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

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Why did the old man die? He was old.

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Whats worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being stabbed.

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Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

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-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

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How did the hillbilly fix his PC? He brought it to Wal-Mart and got a diagnostics from an expert then installed anti virus software.

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What's the difference between a duck and a bicycle? They both have handlebars. Except for the duck.

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knock knock. who's there? interupting doctor. interupting doctor who....you have cancer.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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What was Tyler's last name? Grzesik.

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Adolf the Red-Nosed Hitler

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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My girlfriend reckons that a small penis shouldn't affect our sex life. She may be right, but I'd prefer it if she didn't have one.

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why did the boy die? because he got shot

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Why did the boy miss the toilet when he was peeing? Cause he was in the shower.

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A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Q: What's grey and can't climb trees A: A car park

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate the chicken.

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Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

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what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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