What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

Hey I Just Met You And This Is Crazy But I Am Pregnant And It's Yhur Baby ~GotDemChoozen

big fat hairy gigantic enourmous erectionn CC

I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

What did the one alcoholic say to the other? We are both alcoholics

What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

What did Tom see after taking a much need long nap? The ceiling.

How old is victor? Half past dead

What do you call an elephant mixed with a rhino? A freak.

A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

What did the mother say when the train hit her? Bad train! We don't hit!

What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an ax.

Hey I just met you I'm on bathsalts your face looks tasty

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

Anti-jokes are funny.

What do you call a lepucaun leaping in a feild of flowers, on christmas? Ground beef.

what happened when 3 had sex with 4? nothing numbers are not capable of sexual intercourse

How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

Q: How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A: Depends on the size of the tub and the size of the babies.

Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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