- Anti Joke

Q: What kind of time is it when you fall from a ladder and are moments from landing straight on a operational circle saw? Moral: ITS TIME TO SPLIT!

Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

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A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

LeBron James: Kobe, i got a ring will you stop making fun of me? Kobe Bryant: Yes Kobe and Michael Jordan: LeBron asked if he gets a ring if we'll stop making fun of him LeBron James: Hey Kobe why didn't you answer when i called? Kobe Bryant: Sorry, I only heard it ring once

Why did the cop pull the black guy over because he was speeding

Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Therefore, I am a potato.

whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

Yo momma so stupid she tried drowning a gold fish. She got accused for animal cruelty.

Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

What's red and smells like blue paint? Fetus Blood. Due to the low concentration of iron, it gives it an aroma of paint.

So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Four because snakes don't have legs.

Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

What starts with "F" and ends in "uck" Firetruck.

How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I killed your family, and now i'm coming after you.

So a guy with no legs and no arms is on his death bed. He asks to sky dive one time before he dies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops