Whats yello and cant swim A bus full of dead children in a lake

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its 2 in the morning Go the f+%& to sleep.

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Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

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Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

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Q: Why was the teacher sad? A: Because she got fired

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What's black and white and red all over? A bloody fight between a black and a white man.

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What do you call a terrorist on 9/11? A terrorist.

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What did Billy say to Timmy? Timmy! I'm so sorry. *Sniffles* I didn't mean to throw the fork that hard. Rest in peace Timmy...

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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Q. What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? A. An horse.

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A guy with a severe attention deficit walks into a bar and... oh, look, the sky is pretty... wait, what was I saying ?

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What did the person say to the other person? "Hello."

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"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

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a man walks into a house... then realizes its not his house and leaves.

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Wha....You probably shouldnt read the rest of this because i lie a lot (This joke deserves lots of thumbs and comments!)

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how do you get 20 people in a mini? open the door would be a good start but i dont think they will all fit.

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did you hear about the two peanuts walking down the street? one was raped.

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Me: Hey mom Mom: Hey Son Me: Whats? for dinner? Mom: I dont know

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Why do all asians all look alike? Because they do.

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Ring Ring! Hello? Hello, is your refrigerator running? Yes it is Good.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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