Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The Pterodactyl species became extinct 65 million years ago, and thus if you saw one today, you would be immediately taken into a mental hospital.

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Why did the bunny cross the road? Because it waited until a car was driving by and then got run over.

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What's Pi times the square root of a panda's earlobe? Panda's do not have earlobes... thus the answer is inexplicable.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Chuck Norris' beard takes 1st 2nd and 3rd in the most impressive beard catagory. He was the only contestant.

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Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead got into a street fight. who won? The redhead because she had a gun.

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Why did the black man get a zero on his SAT? He was up so late helping orphans with disabilities that he fell asleep during the test.

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Why don't woman wear watches? Because there is a clock on the stove!

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took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

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knock knock. who's there? no one. no one who? no one who?

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Knock knock Who's there? Boo AHHH A GHOST D:

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Please ignore this statement.

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wormly wormly sat on the worm theworm said wormly and went to warmly

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What is worse than ending and apple joke in the holocaust? Getting raped by a goat

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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Q: why did the dad drop his baby? A: she was slippery.

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Do you know what hurts? An abortion.

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whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

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How do you scare a plumber? Kill his family.

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What's funnier than an anti-joke? Sarcasm.

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What do you call your mom? Mom

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When life gives you lemons.............. take them free stuff is awesome.

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What kind of martial arts does the Jewish man practice? Kung-Fu

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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