A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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What does a blonde's pussy taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

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What is the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is a piece of wood, while the black man is a human being.

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Knock knock, who's there? Your mom! Oh I'm comming.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

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A Muslim walks into a bar. No-one survived the blast.

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What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

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What did the old man say after he fell down? nothing.

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Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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Are you kidding? If you can slow down time when stressed, then that means that your perception of time is, well... Oh relative, but still wow! What about now though? Can you do it? And for curiosity`s sake, what if you jumped off a roof? Would the stress make it all really slow?

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why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

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MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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First joke of the most-disliked area; 9/11 joke. First joke of the most popular area; Holocaust joke. "You shouldn't joke about 9/11 you sick bastard people died" -Said all Americans ever.

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Yo mama is so old, that it's becoming apparent that she is most likely developing severe senial dementia

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops