What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

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Bob is asleep. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT BOB

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What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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what is brown and wet? Muddy water

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yo Mama so stupid a robber stole her t.v and she ran after him yelling, YOU FORGOT THE REMOTE!

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Chuck Norris got his ass kicked. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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What's the difference between car keys and truck keys? Literally nothing.

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roses are red turtles are random. cancer

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A man walks up to his boss and asks "Do you want to hear a funny joke?". His boss replied,"Yes". Before the man could finish his joke, his boss had a heart attack and died instantly. The next day, when he's in his car with his wife, he asks "You want to hear a joke?", the wife replied "Sure,". before the man could finish his joke, a car hit them and the wife died but the man happened to survive. The next day, he sat on a bench mourning, his friend walked up to him and asked, "Why are you sad?". the man answered, "Every time I try and tell a joke someone dies!", his friend said, "That's not true, just tell me the joke." "Ok" "Two Pigeons walk into a-". Before he can finish his joke his friends is kidnapped and killed. Sadly, the man walks to a ledge, jumps off and commits suicide. The End

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Your mother is so obese, that when shot with a high velocity round from a handgun, the bullet is unlikely to penetrate the several layers of fat protecting her vital organs, like a fleshy kevlar vest. However, she is likely to die from infection, which is highly commom among gunshot wounds.

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want to get screwed for four years? VOTE REFUGLYCAN!

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What do you call a child sitting alone in the back of a bus? Anti-social and on the verge of depression.

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roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

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a naked man walks into a bar the police arrived 10 minutes

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what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

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Knock knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The interrupting doct... You have Cancer

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How do you trick the devil? You give him a ginger.

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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Do you know whats a joke? Something said or done to evoke laughter or amusement, especially an amusing story with a punch line.

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What do you get if you throw a banana at the wall? Nothing.

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DINOSAUR Street Fighter 4: Masterchief edition LOUND ONE! BAKE! And the final results: Sagat: Heh, you want some... cornflakes? *BOOO! YOU THUG!" Ryu: WHOWANTSSOMEPOUNDCAKE! *Delicious poundcake omg" "Well, at least better than serving a fucking bowl of foocking cornflakes with milk in four goddamn hours!" YOU LOSE! "You must defeat my Poundcake to stand a chance, I am the worlds greatest pillow fighter!" GAME OVER

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What's the difference between a brick and a baby? One is a fundamental item used in building walls and the other is a human

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How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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What's funnier than a chicken? nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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